I wrote a version of this piece three years ago for crasstalk.com. Still holds true today for me.
As a good Catholic girl, this is the time of year I think about how I
can be a better person. I think New Year’s resolutions are foolish,
but for some reason I have no problem with Lenten resolutions. I was
pondering why there was such a difference between the two periods of
personal improvement and reflection for me.
I am religious, but I’m more of a cafeteria Catholic. I find the Sacrament of Reconciliation personally unnecessary as I don’t think I need an intermediary between God and me
to obtain his forgiveness. Don’t get me started on the Church’s views
on gays. (Update: I am beginning to feel better about this!) Despite my picking and choosing of the tenets of my religion,
Lent resonates for me. Two of my favorite priests, Fr. Sam and Fr. Bob, love to say that "we are Easter people." I couldn't agree more.
Lent starts on Ash Wednesday. I am going to go to church and have
the sign of the cross put on my forehead with ashes from the burnt palms
from the previous year’s Palm Sunday. The history of the ashes goes
back to a time when during the Lenten season only the faithful were
allowed into church. Those who committed serious sins would be forced
to wear a hairshirt for forty days. That hairshirt was blessed with
palm ashes. I imagine that the wearing of a hairshirt was not unlike
wearing a scarlet letter. It marked you as a grave sinner. Today, it
reflects the fact that we all sin but are seeking redemption.
The act of giving something up for Lent is well known. Catholics are
asked to give up something; be it an appetite, a distraction or
something we love, not to just suffer, but to create a “vacuum” of
sorts. It is hoped that this vacuum is filled by the Holy Spirit.
Perhaps that is why I like it so much. Notice that it isn’t necessarily
about improving oneself, it is more about creating a “space” in your
everyday life for God to enter. Additionally, we are only asked to do
this for 40 days, not permanently. After that period of time it is
hoped that you would permanently create this space for God even as you
go back to enjoying what you sacrificed for Lent.
What many are not aware of is that the Catholic church does not
merely want us to give up during Lent. The Church wants us also to
“give out” and “give in” . By ‘giving out’ one can express their love
of God and Man by making your talents and treasures available. Acts of
kindness, volunteerism, donations of goods and services to those in need
are very much a part of the Lenten tradition. Some Catholics focus on
this aspect of Lent more than the giving up part. At the
conclusion of Mass, the priest asks the congregation to “Go in peace
to love and serve the Lord.” We are supposed to take what we learn
each week in Mass and apply it to the outside world. I love that fact —
that the Church really isn’t about Mass. It really is about applying
Mass to your real life. Way too many Catholics forget that. Priests
included.
The ‘giving in’ part is especially interesting to me as it is quite
Zen. In this age of self-fulfillment we are called to go the opposite
way. In order to find your life, your way or your path, you must lose
it. You must let go of it. We are supposed to give our life and our
trust to God. I also look at it this way: when you cling too heavily to
your wants, desires or results, that you often miss an more interesting
or fulfilling path that was thrown in your way. This giving in part
really feeds into the reasons why we give up during Lent.
I’ve tried to give up many things during Lent over the years. Some
worked out fine and others not so much. I
find I’m much better at doing something than giving up something in
order to create that vacuum or space for God to enter. I do this with
acts of volunteering that put me in direct contact with those in need.
This year, in addition to volunteering, I am adding daily exercise to
the list. Not to get my fat arse moving, that is an added benefit; but
to clear my head of all the cobwebs and crap that interfere with me
creating space or that vacuum for God to enter.